Get Out Of My Head

Advertising Week 2007 is coming up at the end of the month and you can go online now and vote for your favorite slogan. Reading over the list will send you down memory lane as you recite those haunting words, but the hard part will be choosing just one to be your favorite. Last year’s winner was “Don’t Mess With Texas” but who will it be this year? Will it be the Allstate commercials with Dennis Haysbert letting you know “You’re in good hands,” Nike’s classic, “Just Do It,” the infamous “got milk?,” or the popular US Marine Corps slogan, “The Few. The Proud. The Marines?” Jump to the link to cast your vote, and while you are there you can also vote for your favorite icon to join the Kool-Aid Man and Colonel Sanders in the Walk of Fame.

Yahoo! Advertising [http://advertising.yahoo.com/advertisingweek_07/index.html]

Victim of Generation Y

Are you restless at night? Do you desire instant gratification, and get frustrated when things take time? Do you need some distraction on, like the television or music, while you do your work? If you experience these symptoms you might suffer from Generation Y. Being a computer programmer, I noticed I was a victim of Generation Y when I continuously got bored after days of doing nothing but research. I want to see results! I want to write code! It is a trait that Americans have grown to value, but we are failing to teach our kids the value of time and they are quickly evolving into impatient people. The evidence of Generation Y’s effect include instant messenger, email, text messaging, and lighting speed internet connections. The list goes on, and all it proves is that we are forgetting how to disconnect from the world. So, if you suffer from Generation Y, try to schedule a time to check your email, turn your cell phone off for a period of time, or just get away and leave all electronics behind. How do you escape the fast paced world?

Your Two Cents

Last week there was a comic strip that made the headlines on Digg.com and it demonstrated the stupidity and ignorance that I believe exists among many commenters in the online community. You are practically the white trash of the internet and the comment section is your Jerry Springer. I just don’t understand why people feel the urge to post worthless comments; isn’t that why it is called “your two cents.”

In addition to stupid comments, let me go ahead and explain how worthless it is to debate religion in the comment section of an article. Religion is one of the topics I enjoy reading about, obviously to gain an understanding of the world around me, and I recently read the article on the discovery about Mother Theresa’s struggle with her faith. The article was very interesting, but as usual the comments are quickly taken off topic to preach each individual’s own opinions. For some reason, I highly doubt anyone will actively seek these comments as a source for changing their beliefs. So, debating evolution versus creation and all the other crap that people preach in these comments are essentially worthless to everyone but you, who feels the need to express your opinions. Save yourself the embarrassment of being classified with the white trash of the internet and keep your worthless comments to yourself.

“That’s the thing with opinions. You don’t have to know anything to have one.” - Andre Agassi

“…those with the most opinions often have the fewest facts.” - Bethenia McKenstry

“The recipe for perpetual ignorance is: be satisfied with your opinions and content with your knowledge.” – Elbert Hubbard

Is The Golden Rule Dead?

“Treat others as you would like to be treated,” is probably one of the most world wide accepted practices. Despite religion, race, or gender we all want to be treated in the same way you treat others. In other words, lead by example for how believe others should act. This rule can be applied in everything we do, and today I experienced a fine example of this. During my lunch break I returned to the kitchen to clean up my lunch plate and to my surprise there was an empty paper towel roll sitting in the holder. Is it that difficult to grab the empty one, toss it in the recycle bin, and replace it with a new one. All of this can be done without even pivoting your feet! Not that having an empty roll of paper towels is that big of a deal, but it is simply an annoyance, and I am sure many of you would agree, and if you were on the receiving side, as was I today, you would like the previous person to have been so kind to replace the paper towel roll. The same courtesy goes with the coffee pot. If you take the last cup, refill the damn thing! I hope next time you are in this position you remember this post and decide to take the time to do your part in the circle of life. And, if you ever catch me failing to act accordingly, you are welcome to point a nasty finger at me.

5th Grade Lessons

There is no other way to start this then, “Where the hell did I miss this!” I was talking to a friend last night and she called me a dork. I asked her to call me a geek or a nerd, rather than a dork, simply because I think they have a more positive ring to them, if that’s possible. She thought it was because of the original reference of the word dork. What the heck was she talking about? Well, I soon found out that dork is the name for a whale’s penis. Sure enough Wikipedia reads:

It is popularly asserted that the term originated as whalers’ occupational slang for the penis of a whale, and by transfer became an anatomical insult…

Wow, I can’t believe that I didn’t learn this back in the day. I remember learning a lot of other concepts along the same lines. In fact, I was first sent to the principal’s office for this childish behavior. Well, like they say, you learn something new every day. This one is just a little too late, but maybe it’s for the best.

Leave No Driver Behind

Today, I petition you, the citizens of the United States of America, to support my bill to “Leave no driver behind.” It has come to my attention that several drivers, rather citizens who occupy a motor vehicle, have no clue how to drive. What bothers me even more are the citizens who can’t park. This world is full of man different parking spots, but each one should be treated as equal. Just the other day I parked in a spot, and after getting out of my car I realized I was too close to one line, so I jumped back in my car and centered my car appropriately. A passer by saw this and commented on how shocked she was that I did so. We got to talking and she told me about IParkLikeAnIdiot.com. This is the perfect site for this cause and is full of evidence to support my bill. So, please join my cause and if you see a vehicle parked across the lines, or a Hummer parked in a compact parking spot, please notify them that they park like an idiot!